FEED YOUR FACE: Mountain Oysters

OK now, no belly aching. You should try things at least once, just to say you tried.

My great grandma, my grand mother, and grandfather handed me this recipe a long time ago. I will admit that, at first, I was NOT going to eat Mountain Oysters. But you know what? They do taste pretty darn good. So don't be a sissy! Give them a try.

So, here is how to fix them up.
1/2 cup flour
1/2 cup cornmeal
salt and pepper
garlic powder
vegetable oil
1 bottle of beer
1 dozen (ish) mountain oysters (fresh ones are the best, but you can use frozen if you need to)

Make the batter by mixing the flour, cornmeal, and beer. Season it with some salt, pepper, and garlic powder to taste. Try to make the batter a little on the thick side.

Slice the oysters about 1/4 inch thick, then dip 'em in the batter. Cook them puppies in hot oil until medium crisp.

They are best if served while hot, and with a dipping sauce of your liking. I like to make a little sauce of ketchup with horseradish.

Now, I know that a lot of people won't try this. But, you should really be adventurous sometimes and try something new now and then. Or if you have a relative or someone that you are not really fond of, invite them over to watch a football game, baseball, or whatever and serve these up. Tell them that's all you have for munching on. They won't be coming back to soon to your house.

The first time I had these, was when I was a little kid. It was at Thanksgiving. I heard my grandparents talking about having oysters to snack on before we had our big meal. I had just discovered seafood. I love it all.

But, when they served up these oysters (and they were good), I was a little upset that they were not the oysters on the half shell like I had eaten before. They didn't taste like the fried oysters I'd had at the seafood place, and I said as much to my grandparents. You could have heard a pin drop. Papa and Pappy got up and left the kitchen. Mama hollered at them to come back in the kitchen and explain to me just what it was I was eating.

Papa grabbed his coat, and out the front door he went. Pappy,just didn't move fast enough. He came back into the kitchen, beet red, just about ready to bite his pipe in half. 'Course, I've been munching the whole time on these oysters. Pappy just looked at me and started laughing. Mama, giggled, and grandmother, beet red, giggled. Pretty soon the whole family was laughing.

And I just kept on eating them oysters.

It finally came down to my uncle who owned a ranch. He told me what the oysters were. I didn't believe him for one minute and I kept on eating them oysters. Then he asked me if I remembered being on the ranch last summer, and how they took some of the young bulls and had the vet checking on them. He reminded me that old Joe was there with his pocket knife out and the bucket next to him. I said that I remembered that. Well, my uncle asked, what do you think was in the bucket?

OH MY GOD! Them poor young bulls!

I really felt for them. I think I even cried a little at the time on the ranch. Well, they didn't get the reaction I think they thought they were going to get after eating about a half dozen or so and having decided that I liked them. We had them about every other Thanksgiving after that. I even got Mama to fix some up when I would go to her house. Papa and I would just wolf them down and Mama would have to make another batch, just so she could have some.

So, don't be a baby. As they used to say, "Try it, you'll like it." Whip up a batch and FEED YOUR FACE!

FEED YOUR FACE: Zucchini-Tortellini Harvest Soup

Kathi here. I had eaten an Italian soup recipe from a meal-prep company -- you know: the places where you go and assemble meals that you will store in your freezer to cook later?

It was good, but I thought it could be even better, so I invented this version. It makes a crockpot full of soup, and helps use up some of that end-of-the-season zucchini that those of us who grow it have around.

We slice and freeze zucchini, and then we can eat this even in the middle of winter (which we did today!).

It's a very forgiving recipe, so you can add or subtract a bunch of ingredients and it's going to be good, no matter which way you make it.

Oh! And I entered this recipe at Gooseberry Patch. It was selected it to appear in the Gooseberry Patch Fresh from the Farmstand cookbook, so they sent me a free copy of the book.




Zucchini-Tortellini Harvest Soup

• 1 lb. Italian pork sausage links, browned and thinly sliced (I usually place these in a skillet with water and boil them until they are done, which helps cut down on the grease; then I cool them, slice them, and brown them along with the onion in the skillet)
• 1 medium onion, chopped
• 1 or 2 carrots, peeled and chopped
• 2 cups of tomatoes, diced (you can use a can of tomatoes if you don't have fresh)
• 2- 14 oz. cans of vegetable broth (or you can use beef or chicken broth)
• 14 oz. can/jar of pizza sauce
• 2 cups of water
• 1 bay leaf
• 1 or 2 small zucchini, sliced or shredded (I like chunkier, so we slice)
• 9-oz. package of refrigerated cheese tortellini (left uncooked)
• Parmesan cheese, fresh or sprinkle, for flavor and garnish

Add everything to the crockpot except for the zucchini, tortellini, and cheese. Cover and cook on low for 5 to 7 hours. About an hour before you want to eat dinner, add the zucchini and tortellini, then let it cook one more hour. (Discard the bay leaf)

Ladle into soup bowls, and garnish/flavor with parmesan cheese.

So, load up your crockpot, get out your napkins, and get ready to FEED YOUR FACE!

FEED YOUR FACE: A Favorite Fruitcake

This recipe came from Kathi's Grandma Lovey. Grandma thought this was very funny and got it out every year around Christmas-time. When Grandma Lovey passed away, Kathi got her recipe box. This was in it.
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This is my favorite recipe for fruitcake.

You'll need the following:

• a cup of water
• a cup of sugar
• a cup of brown sugar
• 4 large eggs
• 2 cups of dried fruit
• a teaspoon of baking soda
• a teaspoon of salt
• lemon juice
• nuts
• a bottle of whiskey

Sample the whiskey to check for quality.

Take a large bowl. Check the whiskey again to be sure it is of the highest quality. Pour one level cup and drink. Repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar and beat again.

Make sure the whiskey is still okay. Cry another cup.

Turn off the mixerer. Break two leggs and add the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the whiskey to check for consistency.

Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Who cares?! Check the whiskey.

Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table spoon of sugar or something -- whatever you can find.

Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees.

Don't forget to beat off the turner, throw the bowl out the window, check the whiskey again, then go to bed.

FEED YOUR FACE: Apple Chips

This was posted last year, but it's timely and someone new to the blog requested some dehydrating recipes. This is one of Kathi's favorites, and last year's batch (about 25 pounds of apples) lasted her only until July -- and she just used them for snacking, not cooking. Make more!
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Our forefathers and mothers used to be self sufficient. They did just about everything, from fixing the windmill to delivering babies. And they could cook just about anything that was brought to them. If they had too much food they knew how to preserve it, from smoking to drying.

So, we are doing apple chips, but we are going to cheat and use newer technology for old ideas.

First off: at our house we have a food dehydrator. I got tried of using a small one so we got us a BIG one. Now, if you like dried fruit, meat, or veggies then you might want to ask Santa or one of his many helpers for a dehydrator. They are not all that costly, unless you get a BIG one.

OK, so we bought a bunch of honey crisp apples, about 25 pounds or so. The hard part was keeping Kathi (my wife) out of them, 'cause they are her favorite -- which is why we bought honeycrisps in the first place.

You need to mix up some cinnamon sugar and put it in a shaker. Next you will need a big bowl or container to let the apple slices lay in. Also you need lemon juice, or you can use a lemon-lime cola, like Sierra Mist. Also you will need a bunch of paper towels and a large working area. So let's get started.

Wash your apples, and take off them little labels. Next, pour about 1/4 cup of lemon juice into your bow, then add about 5 cups of water. Or use the pop and just pour in several cans. The lemon juice will keep the apple slices from turning brown. Same, if you use the pop.

Now, we have a little machine that you crank by hand. It cores, peels, and slices the apples all at the same time and the slices are uniform, which is good for dehydrating. It also looks good. As the apple is sliced, in one long curl, you break the slice in half. Of course, you can do this by hand if you don't have the fancy little machine.

Place the slices in the bowl for several minutes, then remove them, and lay them out on several sheets of paper towel. Then, pat the apple slices dry. Now, shake some of your sugar cinnamon on all the slices.

Then take those slices off the paper towels and put them on the drying racks. Leave some space between the slices for air to circulate around them. Continue until you have filled up all the racks on your dehydrator or run out of apples or both.


Once you have the racks in place put the lid on or close the door on your dehydrator. Turn it on. You want to set a low temp so that you don't cook them, but suck the moisture out of them. Let them dry for 12 hours or so. If you want them dryer, run them longer. We like our dried, but still pliable.

When they are dry enough, let them set for awhile and cool off some. Then place them in Ziplock bags. Put them in a nice cool place for storage. (I had some dried apples that were about 3 years old and were just as good as the day I made them.)
Now, these are great for a snack or to use in cooking. Make an apple pie with dried apples. Or use them in your dressing or stuffing this Thanksgiving.

You will find all kinds of things to run through your dehydrator. Make up some dry veggies for homemade soups, or dry flowers for potpourri.

It's fun and you can get the whole family involved. You will also save money on meals for your family. So have at it, dry some fruit, and veggies, save a few bucks, and FEED YOUR FACE !

A ROOTIN' TOOTIN' TIME

The story I'm about to relate is true. I hope that I don't offend anyone who follows my blog. So, put down anything that you are drinking, and any sharp objects that are near you.

Now, growing up in my family, we did a lot of outdoor stuff: hunting, fishing, camping. We did a lot of this before we kids were old enough to hunt. And, of course, there are a few traditions that go along with it.

This tradition has to do with food. This food is Dinty Moore Stew, with pork and beans. Now, anytime we were in the hills, we had this for at least one meal. It is quite tasty! I still like it to this day.

My brother in law, Robert, on the other hand has had to eat this on lots of our trips to the hills. He has had it so much that on one deer hunting trip as we were doing the shopping for supplies, my friend Ed and I were told, "NO DINTY MOORE STEW AND PORK AND BEANS!!"

We said OK.

Well, we got a big can of Dinty Moore Stew, and instead of pork and beans we got a can of ranch -style beans and a can of chili. So, now he couldn't say no to the stew, right?

We all know that when you eat beans, you can get gas. But, we had had this for years! All the guys know what it is like in hunt camp. And maybe some of you ladies know also. We cuss, spit, tell dirty jokes, fart, scratch, some may do some drinkin', and we just get silly and have a good time.

Well, we had been hunting for three days and the weather was great -- nice and warm during the day and cool at night.

The next morning we had snow. . .about four or five inches of the white stuff. And it was COLD!

So, we ate a quiet breakfast and headed out to hunt. We all packed up, and took some MRE's for lunch. We figured that we would hunt all day, and come back to camp a little past sundown. The hunting was great. We could walk through the forest and not make a sound, because of the snow. Well, Robert dropped a fat three-point buck, and I got a nice doe. Ed, on the other hand, didn't even get a shot.

When we all got back to camp, it had started to snow and it was getting colder. We got our animals hung and dressed out, then decided that a warm dinner was in order. Ed and I said that we would fix dinner. So, we set up the Coleman stove, got out a large pot, and opened up the stew, ranch style beans, and the chili, and we put it all in one pot.

Now, some of you might be going YUCK. (But it's good!) As it warmed up on the stove, it started to smell pretty good. As it got hotter, it started to smell great! 'Course, Robert had to come over to check out what we had cooking. When he saw the stew can, we thought he was going to pack his gear and go home. But as he took a closer look in the pot and sniffed at it a couple of times, he smiled and said that it smelled better than it looked.

While we were cooking, Robert made us a nice campfire and we had three logs to set on. When the stew was ready, we dished it out in big bowls. We cut up a loaf of sheep herders bread.
Boy howdy, we were like total pigs. We ate, and ate, and we didn't even talk while eating. I mean, this stuff was GOOD! We all had seconds, then thirds.

Well Ed and I quit after the third bowl. Robert, on the other hand, went over to the pot and proceeded to finish up what was left, even taking what was left of the bread to sop up what he couldn't get with a spoon.

So, after a great dinner, Ed and I figured we had come up with a new traditional meal for hunting. Robert cleaned up the mess from dinner, and Ed and I just sat, had a beer, and a smoke. When Robert had finished, he joined us at the fire. We sat, talked, laughed, told stories, drank more beer, and smoked, and just had a good time. After about two hours of this, Robert or Ed let one loose. And of course, we laughed.

Pretty soon, more farts, more laughing. And we moved a little further apart around the campfire. I swear, I saw the flames get bigger and higher a few times. And still, we sat and talked, and laughed. And of course, more farts.

Well it got to the point, that we couldn't finish a sentence without passing gas at least six times. Now that I look back on this, I think it was one of the most quiet outside of camp that I had ever heard. I mean, we were on some open range, and there had been some cows around the outside of our camp, and there had been some birds around also. And the pesky chipmonk and squirrels that are always in camp were nowhere to be seen or found.

After several hours of passing gas and talking we decided it was time to hit the sack. We have always slept in a tent when hunting. Even in the dead of winter. And this time, we had one of them little dome tents. You know the kind -- you get down on your knees and crawl in. The tent was plenty big enough for the three of us. Ed on one side, me on the other, and Robert in the middle.

We found out why they call sleeping bags "fart sacks" that night. It's a good thing that the tent was staked down. With all that gas, we could have floated off, never to be heard from again!

Well, poor ol' Robert, being in the middle, caught the biggest part of the gas that was going around. Ed and I had set our bags up so that the zippered part of our bags were towards Robert. And when one of us would let one loose, we would fan our bags toward him.

None of us got up that night to make a call to Mother Nature. We went to sleep, fartin' and laughing. Robert, on the other hand, was not laughing. He gagged, coughed, spit, and sputtered, and made all kinds of comments about not being able to breathe. Me? I have this sinus thing 24/7. I've had it since I was a little kid. So, I only got a whiff every once in a while. Ed, I think, had put a bandana over his nose and mouth.

When I awoke the next morning, I could smell! My sinuses had cleared right up. And, boy! did it ever stink in that tent. I looked over and Ed was snoring, Robert, at some point in the night, had unzipped the tent flap and stuck his head out of the tent. I woke Ed up, and he looked over at Robert, sleeping with his head outside the tent. Robert hadn't moved.

At some point it had quit snowing during the night. As we moved the tent flap just a bit, to take a peek at Robert, he let out a scream. As we had moved the tent flap, some snow fell and hit Robert right in the face. Have you ever seen some one try to jump up in a little tent?

Well, we got up, made some coffee, and dragged our bags out of the tent. We hung the bags up every morning for the next three days, and they still smelled of chili, ranch style beans, and Dinty Moore Stew. Hell, we even threw some pine branches on the camp fire, and tried to smoke our sleeping bags so they would smell of pine.

Didn't work. They then smelled of pine and ranch style beans, and chili, and -- yep -- Dinty Moore Stew.

The rest of our hunting trip was pretty dull. Every night we tried to stay up, so we wouldn't have to get in them sleeping bags. The last night, we all slept in Robert's van.

When we got back home, I washed my bag like three times and ended up having to have it cleaned at the laundromat. Ed had to do the same thing. I never used that bag again. I bought a new one for the next hunting trip.

Somehow, my sister managed to get Robert's bag to smell pretty good. It was a bit shorter, but it smelled nice.

The tent: Robert set it up in his yard to "air out." The sad part is, the tent belonged to his sons. It sat in the yard for something like a week. They never had to waterproof that sucker ever again. I'm sorry to say that my nephews had to use that tent for a winter boy scout outing. They had the whole tent to themselves. No one offered to sleep in the tent with them. And it seems that the color of the tent was not as bright as it was when we used it for hunting. Go figure. The boys said it wasn't too bad, as long as you had something to cover your nose with!

The following summer, the tent was used maybe twice. It was just too unbearable. It was completely permeated. The good thing? They didn't have any bugs or flies in the tent, as they pretty much keeled over at the doorway.

All hunting and outdoor excursions from then on required that uncles and friends had to sleep in a tent of their own.

Robert and I haven't had our traditional meal on any mountain trips for years. And if the subject comes up, Robert's eyes just seem to start leaking and he turns a funny color.

So, if you want to pull a good one on some of your huntin' and fishin' buddies, just buy a big can of Dinty Moore Stew, a can of ranch style beans, and a can of chili. Dump it all in a big pot, and heat it up. Serve it in a big bowl with some bread. They may think that it is gross until they get a whiff of it after it is heated. It really does smell -- and taste-- good.

For yourself, I would suggest that maybe you eat a sandwich or something, and don't set near a open flame. Also, you might want to sleep by your self that night also. And maybe at some distance from the rest of them. Also, after all the fun that night, it might be a nice gesture to hand out some extra T.P. the next morning.

And maybe you should not serve this if you're in bear country. You know how they like the smell of dead things. If you serve it while duck hunting, maybe serve it for lunch. You can then hunt without that pesky duck call hanging around your neck that always gets in the way. But, please. . . do NOT do this if you are hunting from a heated duck blind. Big explosions scare off the game. If you use a tree stand -- well, you'er on your own. Maybe this should be under FEED YOUR FACE! Oh, another thought, maybe serve this to your pesky in laws. They won't come back for years.

Kathi and I have Dinty Moore stew with a little can of pork and beans every now and then. When we do, we try to do it on a weekend. But I wouldn't do it on a Sunday. Come Monday, people you work with would not be pleased. 'Course, you could maybe blame it on someone else. If you're female, I wouldn't wear pantyhose. You might blow a shoe off and hurt someone.

FEED YOUR FACE: A FAMOUS BEAN SOUP

Kathi here. Jim really likes to eat at The Buckhorn Exchange. It is one of Denver's historic restaurants, and they have tasty food.

The restaurant publishes its bean soup recipe on its Web site. We always have to eat the bean soup when we go, even though we know it's going to make us feel too full. And it always does.

Now that Fall weather is here, I've been hungry for soup, and we had never made The Buckhorn Exchange Famous Bean Soup before, so thought we'd make that.

We followed the recipe, but added some things we like and made it just a little different. So I guess we made the famous soup, just not so famous.

Their recipe (linke above) says:
1-lb. Great Northern beans
½ cup diced onion
3-oz diced ham
1-oz chicken base
½ tsp Seasoned Salt
1 tsp Liquid Smoke
1 tsp granulated garlic
1 tsp white pepper
½ gallon water
1-oz cornstarch
½ cup water
Place first 9 ingredients in a large pot, cover and place in a 200 degree oven for 8 hours. When
beans are tender, remove from oven, place on stovetop and bring to boil. Mix cornstarch and ½ cup water, add to soup to thicken, and let simmer for 15 minutes.

And we did all that. But we also added:

3/4 cup diced onion (instead of 1/2 cup called for)

3/4 cup diced carrot

3/4 cup diced celery

We also added more ham. I wanted to add a half pound of diced ham, and Jim did put in a little more, but not much. Hmmmmpf!

We placed it all in a cast iron Dutch oven. You could also, I'm sure, make this in a slow cooker.

The house smelled really good while this was cooking, and our tongues were happy when it was done. The beans were tender, the soup had little chunky vegetables and pieces of ham throughout, and the broth was flavorful. It made a good-sized batch, but not so much that we'll have to eat it every day for a week.

And if you ever get to Denver, try to make time in your schedule to eat a meal at The Buckhorn Exchange!

FEED YOUR FACE: Spaghetti Sauce from Roma Tomatoes

Jim made some yummy spaghetti sauce when we bought a couple flats of Roma tomatoes a couple weeks ago for just $5 each. Here's what he did.

First, he washed, then cut about 50 Roma tomatoes in half lengthwise and scooped the seeds out with a spoon.

Then he roasted the tomatoes on his smoker grill just long enough for them to get where their skins were ready to just fall off. You can do them on your grill or put them on a cookie sheet in your oven (which will take a little longer).

Next, he put them in the crockpot (or Jim would say, "pile them in your crock pot.")
He added:
1/3 cup Jack Daniels
5 cloves of crushed garlic
1 teaspoon oregano
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon black pepper
1 whole medium onion, diced

You can add more stuff to it if you like. He made a basic sauce that he will add additional things to when he uses it.

Then let it cook down for quite awhile. Jim left our in the slow cooker for about 18 hours.

It smelled really, really good while he was cooking it.

He then took the stick blender to the pot of sauce, and got any remaining chunks blended out.

This made about 3 quarts of sauce. I canned it into three quart jars, and there was enough left that he had it on an omelet one morning, and over some noodles for lunch.

As Jim would say, "Get out your spaghetti fork and the spinkle cheese, and get ready to feed your face!"

BUSY BUSY BUSY

Holy moly. I've been busier than a one legged man at a butt kickin' contest. It has been a lot of running from here to there and everywhere.

We got my Dad and Mom to go to the flea market last weekend. We pushed him around in a wheelchair, so several of us got a good workout. Dad, on the other hand, just kicked back and enjoyed the ride. He directed whomever was pushing, saying "Take me over to that table." "Cross over to that table, he has tools!" "Look at them kerosine heaters over there." "Find out what he wants for that generator." "Push me over to that table, it has tools." (I guess you can never have to many tools.) "What in the world?! Is that a old GI stove over there? Yep. Well, the whole damn thing is rusted on the inside."

And Mom just kind of followed along. I'm glad that Kathi went with. It gave Mom someone to talk to. Then we got to the fruit and veggie vendors. It was a little hard to to follow the conversation when trying to buy some fruit or veggies, but thanks to Kathi and her Spanish.

In Spanish, aout all I can do is ask for beer and count to 10. And maybe enough to get myself in trouble or get my face slapped.

We bought some tomatoes and some poblano peppers. My sister bought some corn, 25 ears for $6. So we loaded up everything on Dad's lap. It was kind of hard for him to see over everything there at the end. But, what the heck -- he had seen it all when we first got there!

After the weekend, Kathi had Monday off from work and I ran amok. Plenty to do. We roasted tomatoes and peppers. We took one flat of Roma tomatoes, smoked and roasted them in our smoker, along with the peppers. We then put the tomatoes in our slow cooker, and made spaghetti sauce. (Recipe to come later.)

We took the other flat of tomatoes and sliced them up, sprinkled garlic powder on some, oregano on some others, and a little bit of salt on some others. Then we thew them in our dehydrator.

The tomatoes took 23 hours at 140 degrees. Man, oh man, did they ever come out good! So, we may head back to the flea market this Saturday and see about getting some more. The sauce also came out great. There were about 50 some Romas to a flat.

I promise to post the sauce recipe next week. Yum. So, get ready to Feed Your Face!

Pumpkin bread. Or cake. It's just good.

Kathi here. I LOVE pumpkin stuff. Pretty much anything pumpkin. We have a neighborhood restaurant that always makes a really good pumpkin gnochi when it's pumpkin season. That reminds me that we need to go there so I can eat it!

I make this pumpkin bread/cake a lot because it is tasty and has a good texture. Oh! And because it uses just two ingredients: a cake mix and a can of pumpkin puree.

Seriously, just take the cake mix and add the can of pumpkin, then blend until it's combined. Bake it in a pan in the oven on 350 degrees for 50 minutes to and hour, and you have pumpkin bread. Or cake. Whatever.

Sometimes I make it in a bundt pan, but most of the time I just do it in a loaf pan. And sometimes I use frosting, sometimes I sprinkle it with powdered sugar, and sometimes I leave it plain.

Jim would say it's good to Feed Your Face with. My tongue just gets happy. Make one and see for yourself!

FEED YOUR FACE: Sourdough Cinnamon Rolls

Kathi here. You may have read Jim's post from a couple weeks ago about sourdough starter. It was a good one!

I'm using some of his sourdough starter to make cinnamon rolls. Yum.

The dough is tender and flavorful, with butter and cinnamon throughout.

For the dough, you will need:
1 cup of sourdough starter
1/4 cup warm water
1 teaspoon of yeast
1/2 cup sugar
1 teaspoon of salt
1/4 cup of dry buttermilk powder
1/3 cup lard, shortening, or butter, melted and cooled a bit
2 eggs (at room temperatur)
about 3 cups of flour

You'll also want to set out a stick of butter to soften while you work so that it's ready to spread when it comes time to do the filling.

Put the sourdough starter in the big bowl that came with your KitchenAid mixer. And get your dough hook ready so you don't have to do all the work by hand. Then, don't forget to feed the sourdough and let it sit out to re-activate a bit before you put it back in the refrigerator. (Jim would be most unhappy if he had to start over his sourdough, I'll bet, if I forgot that part.)

Add the salt, sugar, melted fat, buttermilk, and eggs. Use the dough hook attachment and combine these ingredients just a bit.

Take the 1/4 warm water and sprinkle the yeast onto the surface, then let it stand about 5 minutes. It will get a little bubbly. Then, add that to the mixture in the mixer. (Say that three times really fast!)

Turn on the mixer, and gradually add the flour until the dough forms a soft ball of dough and starts to climb the dough hook. Be sure the dough is not sticky. Once you make this a few times you'll know what the dough should feel like. It will be soft and poofy, kinda like a chubby baby butt. It will be soft and tender in feel.

Take it out of the bowl, place some softened butter or some vegetable oil on one hand, and rub it lightly all over the surface of the dough. Put it in a bowl or on a cutting board or something, cover it with a tea towel (oh, how old fashioned do I sound!), and let it rise until it is about doubled in size. This could take as a little as an hour if you have happy sourdough and yeast, but don't give up on it if it takes longer. Sometimes when it's cold in my house, I have to heat the inside of the oven to about 150 degrees, turn it off, then put the covered dough in there to make it happy.

This part is nerdy fun: once the dough has risen to double, give it a big punch with your fist. It's a very satisfying feeling. Maybe I have deep-seated anger issues! I feel no ill will toward the dough, but it is just so FUN!

Okay, with that out of the way, it's time to roll out the dough. I use a big ass ol' vinyl cutting board, but you could use your table surface if you want to. Or countertop. Or something like that. Rub a little flour across that surface, plop the dough there, and roll it out to a rectangle about 18"x20".

Take the softened butter (you did remember to do that, didn't you?) and rub it evenly across the surface of the dough. Oh, yum. And yes -- just use your bare hands. Don't be a sissy!

Then use about 1/2 cup of sugar (white, brown, mixed -- whatever you want to use is fine) and a big tablespoon's worth (or maybe even two) of cinnamon. Spread/sprinkle that on top of the butter.

Then roll the whole thing up like a log, and cut it into 12 equal pieces. Or if you want smaller rolls, cut it into more pieces. I usually cut it in half, then each half in half, then each half of a half into thirds. That'll give you 12.

Place them into a 9"x12" pan. Now cover that pan with the same tea towel, and let them rise to about double again. They will be all squished together. But that's okay. Preheat the oven to 400 degrees.

Once they've risen, you can slide the pan into the oven. Bake them at 400 degrees for about 15 minutes, until they are nice and light golden brown and they will smell really good. Set the pan on a cooling rack, and you can make the icing.

For the frosting, I just combine more softened butter, a splash of vanilla (did you see Jim's post about homemade vanilla? This will be a good time to try it out.), and some cream. Well, you could use milk or even water, but cream? That's gonna taste really good. Don't get all stressy about amounts. It'll work out and is hard to ruin. But if you really want numbers, try 3 tablespoons of the softened butter, 1 cup of powdered sugar, and a teaspoon or vanilla extract. Some people I know like to put a pinch of salt in their frosting, so do it if you want to. You'll want this thin, but still spreadable. Well, *I* want mine thin, but still spreadable.

Once the rolls have cooled at least 20 minutes, put the frosting on the rolls and spread or drizzle it around.

Jim likes when I put another little pat of softened butter on a small plate or saucer, then the cinnamon roll, then another little pat of butter on the top. He usually gets his way in this. I used to make these where I melted a stick of butter in the baking pan before I added the rolls, so I can give in to his request for a tiny bit more butter. (Still, if you want something REALLY good, try melting the stick of butter into the baking pan before you put the rolls in, and don't tell your doctor you did it.)

Get your plate and fork, get the butter, put it all together, and FEED YOUR FACE!

FEED YOUR FACE: Breakfast Hash

How about, for a cold and lazy morning, making some breakfast hash to feed your family!

There are lots of ways to make hash. Some people just throw in some leftovers from the fridge or make corn beef hash (or get it from a can).

Well, let's try what I call Italian Hash.

You'll need:
1 pound of Italian sausage
1/2 cup chopped red onion
3 tablespoons veggie oil
1/2 cup sour cream
2 teaspoons Dijon mustard
1 package of hash browns, or grate your own from a real potato
Salt and pepper to taste

In your skillet, cook the sausage and onion. (I slice up the sausage or remove the casing -- or sometimes I do both.)

Cook that over medium heat until the sausage is browned. Remove the sausage and onion with a slotted spoon. Drain the grease. Get rid of the excess grease in the skillet.

Heat 2 tablespoons of the vegetable oil in your skillet. Add the hash browns, spreading them in a even layer. Press down lightly with spatula. Cook 6 to 7 minutes or until golden brown on the bottom. Drizzle with 1 tablespoon of oil, turn hash browns over with spatula, and cook 6 to 8 more minutes until the potatos are golden brown and tender. Turn them again if need be.

In a medium bowl, stir the cooked sausage and onion, sour cream, and mustard until well blended. Stir that mixture into your potatos. Cook until heated through. Season with salt and pepper.

Then throw on a poached or fried egg and dig in.

I had this on the ranch years ago. My aunt and uncle had hired a crew for haying season. One of the guys was Italian. My aunt cooked for the haying crew, three meals a day. Well, one morning, my aunt had cut her hand and some of the crew were at the house. My aunt had kitchen help, but they could not do all the cooking themselves. So this crew member jumped up and offered to help. My aunt was a little surprised by his offer, but he jumped right in and she let 'im.

Old Joe was setting at the table when I came into the kitchen. He was sipping on his coffee and watching this Italian fellow, now with an apron on, take over my aunt's kitchen. This guy was all over the place. My aunt was seated at the table, giving directions. This fellow followed what she wanted done until he was cooking the hash browns. He looked at my aunt, then at the hash browns, and asked if that was all she did with her hash browns. She said for today, they would be fine just the way they were.

Well, he said something under his breath and went back to cooking. While cooking breakfast, my aunt always had dinner being cooked and prepared also. And we knew that night we were having spaghetti. Well, there was some Italian sausage left over, so before my aunt knew what was happening, this guy whipped up the sausage and onions and stuff and put it in the hash browns.

Old Joe just kind of made a face, looked at me, and winked. Breakfast was served, and everybody had more than enough to fill their bellys, including my aunt, who would wait until everyone else had eaten first. Then she would eat after the crew headed out the door. I think that my aunt was a little surprised by this guy's good cooking.

With her hand in a bandage, she really could not do much in the kitchen. The guys left to cut hay, and the Italian guy helped to clean up the kitchen. Then he came in and told my aunt that he would come back to help with lunch. He did, and it was good eating. My aunt ended up keeping him at the ranch through the haying season and my uncle had to hire one more for the haying crew.

Man, did we eat good that season! Old Joe taught him how to ride a horse and even shared his little bunk house with him. They were quite the pair. Old Joe had this fellow all decked out like a real cowboy. And old Joe got to eat lots of Italian food in trade.

On several nights, we would set out side of Joe's place, him with his mouth harp, and the Italian guy with a violin. The music was great. Joe never could pronounce this fellow's name, so he ended up being called Hash. Hash stayed on for awhile. He got real good at riding a horse and being a cowboy, working on the ranch.

Those were some great times in my life.

So, have some breakfast hash and FEED YOUR FACE!

FEED YOUR FACE: Buttermilk Cornbread

Here you go. You need:
1 cup corn meal
1/3 cup all purpose flour
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1 egg, beaten
1 cup buttermilk

Combine the dry ingredients, then add thebeaten egg and the buttermilk. Mix it up, and pour it into a greased, heated 8 inch or 9 inch cast iron skillet.

Bake at 400 degrees for 20 minutes, or until lightly browned.

Get out the butter and homemade jelly! Leave some for the rest of the family. Well, IF you can.

My sister and I would wake up to the smell of this cornbread on fall mornings. Brings back lots of memories. So FEED YOUR FACE!! And enjoy.

Making Vanilla: FEED YOUR FACE

Real vanilla is expensive. Imitation vanilla doesn't taste as good, and some of them taste like chemicals to me.

I saw on a blog how to make vanilla extract yourself. That's a good idea, right? That way you control what goes into it and how much. And the ingredients can be way less expensive than buying the prepared product.

So, we sent away for some vanilla beans. The vanilla beans I found at the grocery store were dried up and you only got 3 beans for about six dollars. I bought vanilla beans on amazon.com (pure Madagascar vanilla beans), 16 for about $10. (Though if anyone wants to tell me where to get quality beans for even less, do tell!)

I saw Suzanne McMinn's process on Chickens in the Road. She knows how to do a LOT of things and make a lot of ingredients herself. She even taught me how to make homemade cake mix. Yay!

So, anyway, we followed her method, but we are using just a little bit different alcohol, just to see. Here is her recipe for the "big bottle method."

I love orange vodka. Well, I love lots of flavors of vodka! But I usually have orange on hand. So, our first batch is made with orange vodka.

Not to be left out, Jim wanted vanilla made from Jack Daniels whiskey.

So, that's what we did. It takes about 3 beans per cup of alcohol, and it takes about 4 weeks for it to "do."

We'll let you know in about 3 more weeks how it went. Here are our pictures (and I recommend you follow Suzanne's instructions).

FEED YOUR FACE: CANNING THAT YOU CAN CAN

My parents, grandparents, and great grandparents all canned food themselves. And a lot of what they canned we can buy at our local stores, already canned and ready to open, warm up, and eat. There are some who still do home canning.

Home canned corn tastes so much different than the store-canned corn. Everything I have ever had from home canning tastes so much better, and all the vitamins and stuff are still there. No additives like they put into all the store canned goods!

One year, Mom and Dad put up over 300 quarts of green beans, 50 some odd quarts of potatoes and corn. Not to mention how many quarts of tomatoes. And we won't even start on how much jelly and jams they have done. They canned just about everything that you can can. Even bread and semi-cooked pork sausage, as well as fish and some other meats.

Well, I came across a blog where they have home-canned bacon. I have heard of store bought canned bacon. But never home canned bacon. Check it out at:
http://www.rual-revolution.com/2011/01/canning.bacon.html

I think that we will try this real soon. Course, keeping from cooking it all and eating it all will be a problem. You can this bacon raw, do the pressure can thing, and put on the shelf. Pretty neat. So for all of you canning people, maybe this is something to try the next time bacon is on sale at the store. At our house, we can NEVER have to much bacon.

So check it out. Give it a try. And let me know what you think.

FEED YOUR FACE: Sourdough

How long has it been since you had some sourdough? I had some sourdough pancakes years ago that were made from a sourdough that I was told was 60 some years old. That's a long time to have sourdough.

The sourdough had been in the family for years, and came from a sourdough kit that his great grandma had started. Sourdough is fun and quite good. And the things you can make are mouthwatering. You're only limited by what you can't think of.

Here is a sourdough starter with yeast. And then, one with out yeast. You need:
1 envelope yeast
1 tbsp sugar
1 1/2 cups warm water (not hot water -- you should be able to comfortably stick your finger in it)
2 cups flour
1 tsp salt

Dissolve the yeast in the warm water, then mix in the other ingredients. Place the dough in a covered dish and set it aside in a warm place for 1 or 2 days. (We have ours in a little crock jar.)
Always leave at least 1 cup or more of your starter for seed. Replenish it with 1 cup flour and a cup of milk or water. Your sourdough starter may be delayed for a few days when kept in your fridge. But it still does its thing, only slower. Which can sometimes be a good thing.

Sourdough starter without yeast
2 cups warm water
2 cups flour
2 tbsp sugar
1/2 tsp salt
Mix well, and store in a covered dish for several days in a warm place. And, again, replenish with 1 cup of flour and 1 cup of milk or water. And always leave at least 1 cup of your starter for seed. And this starter will also be a little delayed when kept in your fridge.

Now make some up, make some pancakes with some blueberries! Fry an egg or two, throw in some bacon, and you will have nothing but smiles all around the kitchen or deer camp. Or make some bread from your starter, and get out the butter and homemade jam.

S0, quit drooling, get with it, and start some sourdough! You won't be sorry. Just make sure you have enough napkins to go around, 'cause every one will want some.

So, FEED YOUR FACE!! And enjoy.

FEED YOUR FACE: Old Joe's Texas camp bread

Old Joe said that his Ma used to make this quite often. He said it dates back to the 1850's.
So let's get started. You need:
10 cups flour
3 teaspoons salt
4 teaspoons black pepper
1 teaspoon sugar
1 tablespoon lard
4 1/2 cups water

Also, you need your dutch oven or cast iron skillet.

Sift and mix all the ingredients together. Use lukewarm water to make a fairly dry dough. Let the dough set for about 20 to 30 minutes. Roll out the dough until it is 1/4 to 1/2 inch thick. Cut the dough into rounds using your biscuit cutter, and cook on a hot, bacon-greased cast iron skillet or dutch oven.

Poke with a fork and turn them over when browned on the first side.

These hummers are great when out camping, hunting, or fishing. Plus, you could break a few in half, put them in a bowl, add some strawberries or peaches or whatever kind of fruit you have on hand. And maybe a big spoon of ice cream.

Old Joe made these when my sister and I were at the ranch. Man, talk about good! We would set around a campfire and have them after supper. Somehow he would come up with some wild strawberries that he would put sugar on then let them set in a cooler on ice.

While we stuffed our faces, he would tell a few stories. Heck, even Uncle Fay would stuff his face, and smack his lips and lick the bowl like a little kid. Uncle Fay would even listen to some of the stories Old Joe would tell. Sometimes, with eyes as big -- if not bigger -- than mine or my sister's.

So give this a try. Make a batch, and get out the butter and homemade jelly. Smack your lips, and rub your tummy. I think that you will really like these. . .

So, FEED YOUR FACE!

My first cookbook: FEED YOUR FACE

Jim is still not able to sit at the computer long enough to blog, so I thought I would share with you about my first cookbook: Better Homes and Gardens Junior Cookbook.

My parents gave this to me for my 9th birthday. I was just working on my Girl Scout Cooking Badge.

The previous summer I had been to Girl Scout day-camp, and they taught us an "easy and portable" recipe, which was basically canned Chef-Boyardee spaghetti with a can of corn added to it, then served in an ice cream cone. It really did look as if someone had already eaten it previously. Well, and tasted that way, too.

Any cookbook was going to be an improvement!

The Better Homes and Gardens Junior Cookbook featured some very basic recipes. My sister Karen was just a year younger than I was, and she was also interested in the book. We would look over all the recipes, see if we had the ingredients for them, then make things.

These were not recipes that would require much. The first section of the cookbook featured beverages, and included "recipes" for grape float, orange float, cocoa, chocolate shake, lime fizz, eggnog, and tutti-fruitti-ice SPARKLE, which was basically KoolAid made into ice cubes, with 7-Up poured over them. I loved the pretty colors, but I was especially enamored of the glasses with the lemon-wedge art on them and the to-DIE-for lemon swizzle sticks.
To this day, I love citrus-y things, and have a set of nice, large glass tumblers with glass lemon wedges on them. No swizzle sticks yet, though.

There were recipes for such exciting items as cinnamon toast and biscuits (made from biscuit mix, not from scratch).

I really liked the picture of the egg-salad sandwich boats (egg salad on a hot dog bun), until I got sick at school one day after having egg salad. I couldn't even look at it again until I was about 30.

There were recipes for cookies, candies (think fudge), baked apples, and applesauce with red hots.

Main dish items included "frankfurters," cheeseburgers, oven-fried chicken, and mock drumsticks. My sister and I became obsessed with getting the cheese to melt just like the picture of the cheeseburgers in the book. (She's a vegetarian now, so I'm sure she never even thinks of that these days.) We also made the mock drumsticks, which were pretty much meatloaf on a stick.

There was a recipe for saucy spaghetti that was made by taking a can of spaghetti and adding a can of Vienna sausage. Ugh. Maybe my Girl Scout camp leaders were cookbook contributors.

The macaroni-and-cheese recipe was for making it from the box. That's a recipe? Really?

The salads were very basic. Like, take two pineapple rings, plop it on lettuce, stick a cherry and walnut halves on it and call it a salad. The "Peter Rabbit" salad was a canned pear half on a bed of lettuce, decorated with marshmallows, cherries, and cloves to make it look like a rabbit, though it really looked more like a mouse. Eeuuww.

Still, we used the heck out of that cookbook and the cover and every page is stained with something we spilled.

I am a better cook than that, now. But it's still fun to look at the book, especially the pictures.

Do you remember your first cookbook? Do you still make things from it? Or at least look at it?

FEED YOUR FACE: Guinness Ice Cream

Kathi here. I am NOT a fan of drinking Guinness. It's way too serious of a drink for me.

One of the girls at work chose an Irish Pub as her birthday celebration place and ordered Guinness ice cream for dessert. She shared with the rest of us, and I liked it right away. Really!

So, I looked online for a recipe so I could make it at home. I found several, including one that used 15 egg yolks, but the one I based my trial batch on was from Emeril on The Food Network. This links to his recipe.

Here's how I made it.

• 12 oz. Guinness Stout
• 2 cups heavy cream
• 2 cups half-and-half
• 3/4 cup sugar
• 1 tablespoon of vanilla
• 6 egg yolks

In a saucepan, simmer the Guinness until it reduced by 3/4. This means you need to cook it down to about 3 oz. Emeril's recipe says it takes about 8 minutes. It took me about 15 minutes. Pour it into a measuring cup and set it aside. The measuring cup is so you know how much is there. I guess you could use a little more than 3 oz. if you want to!

In a saucepan, combine the cream, half-and-half, sugar, and vanilla. Bring it to a gentle boil over medium heat, then remove from the heat.

In a bowl, beat the 6 egg yolks. I saved the egg whites in two little glass bowls with lids, 3 in each, and I'll either use them when I make a quiche or maybe I'll make a big poofy cake. Angel food, maybe. Doesn't that use a lot of egg whites?

Slowly whisk in 1 cup of the hot cream mixture. Jim helped me do this 'cause I'm not exactly coordinated enough to do that. At least not without burning myself or making scrambled eggs in cream anyway. He whisked, I poured.

Then whisk that mixture into the rest of the cream. Jim whisked, I poured. Then cook the mixture some more until it reaches 170 degrees. I used a candy thermometer to see when that happened.

Emeril says to strain the mixture through a fine mesh strainer, then it calls for chilling for two hours. Instead, I poured it into a pitcher and chilled it overnight. THEN I strained it using one of my jelly bags. I'm glad I strained it, 'cause there were a few little chunks.

SO. . . pour it into a clean container (I used a pitcher 'cause it made it easier to pour later) and cover the surface with a piece of plastic wrap touching it. That's so it doesn't form a skin. Did you like pudding skin when you were a kid? I did, but Jim canNOT stand the thought of it. Anyway, this would make a pudding skin if you don't put the plastic wrap on it.

I chilled it about 24 hours, 'cause I just didn't have time to make it all at once. Then, I strained it through a jelly bag to get the little chunks out.

In Emeril's recipe it says to add the Guinness reduction after chilling. I mixed it with the cream mixture before chilling. I just didn't want the Guinness sitting around waiting for me to spill it. That's pretty much the only reason.

All you need to do after that is to process it in your home ice-cream maker! Jim helped me do that part, mainly 'cause he just likes to. It took about 30 minutes in our big ol' ice cream maker, maybe a little longer.

Then you could put the ice cream in a plastic container to "cure." Jim gave me the paddle to lick. Nugget was jealous, but I did share a little and he licked it right up! I should have taken a picture of that, shouldn't I have?

Oh! And another idea. Because I don't like Guinness to drink (and Jim does, but it would take him awhile to drink much of it), we bought a bottle of it that was 24 ounces. It was way cheaper than buying a 6-pack. Plus, we now have 12 ounces left, which is just the right amount to make a nice beer bread with.

So, get your ice cream maker ready, make some Guinness ice cream, and FEED YOUR FACE!

Getting Ready to Cookout: Homemade Worcestershire Sauce (for making BBQ sauce this weekend)

Jim is still not able to sit long enough to blog efficiently, so here I am again.

Let's get ready to make some BBQ sauce later this week (for me, this weekend). It's gonna be a good one, and features my favorite fuzzy fruit. From Palisade. Hint, hint.

One ingredient you can make at home that tastes way better than store-bought is Worcestershire sauce. It's quick and easy, and even if you don't can, you can store it in your refrigerator for up to 3 months! That'll get you through summer, right?

You'll need:
3/4 cup soy sauce
1 to 2 tablespoons of packed brown sugar
2 tablespoons of molasses
a tablespoon of apple cider vinegar
a whole jalapeno, slit open
1/2 a nutmeg
6 cloves
a chunk of lemon peel, not too big
a chunk of fresh ginger, peeled and grated

Combine all the ingredients in a saucepan. Heat and then simmer 10 minutes. Remove from the heat, cover, and let rest until cooled, then move the covered saucepan to the refrigerator and let it sit for 24 hours.

Prepare a sterilized jar. (I usually do a load of dishes in the dishwasher and use the heated dry setting.) Boil some water in a small saucepan and prepare a canning jar lid by turning the burner off once the boiling starts, and toss in the two-piece lid and let it sit until you are ready.

Strain the sauce to get out the chunks. I usually use cheesecloth to do that. Then re-heat the sauce and transfer it to the sterilized jar. Put the lid on. Let cool to room temperature, then put it in the refrigerator and store it tightly covered. It will keep about 3 months.

Get it ready now, 'cause we're making BBQ sauce this weekend!

Kathi

FEED YOUR FACE: A Quick Quiche Lorraine

I love quiche, but especially Quiche Lorraine. What's not to like about bacon, onion, and cheese with a crust?

This one is quick to make, which I like mainly because then it is quick to eat!

The ingredients are:

• 6 slices of bacon, cut into 3/8" to 1/2" pieces
• 1 small sweet onion, diced
• 4 oz. Gruyere cheese, greated
• 6 eggs
• 1 cup heavy cream
• 1 prepared pie crust (either you can make it or Pillsbury can make it for you)
• salt, pepper, and grated nutmeg to taste

First, place the pie crust in the pie pan (or a small cast iron skillet) and let it rest the entire time you are preparing the recipe.

Place the bacon pieces in a skillet and cook them until they are done. You are the one who decides what "done" is. Remove the pieces with a slotted spoon to a plate lined with paper towels to absorb the excess bacon grease. Let cool.

Toss the onion into the grease left in the skillet, and cook them until they are carmelized. They will be brown anyway because of the hot bacon grease. Snobby people think that's a bad thing. I'm not a snobby people, and I think the color is a good thing. Remove these with a slotted spoon to another plate lined with paper towels to absorb the excess bacon grease. Let cool.

Crack the eggs and place them in a bowl. Beat them by hand until they are smooth. Add the salt, pepper, and nutmeg. Then add the cooled bacon and onion, cream, and cheese, and mix to combine.

Pour the mixture into the prepared pie crust, and pop it into a 350 degree oven for about 50 minutes. Sometimes my oven and my pie plate decide that a whole hour is better, so just check it to see if it is as done as you like.

When you take it out of the oven, let it set for a few minutes (I would say about 10 -- long enough to cut some watermelon to serve with it).

Cut it into 6 wedges and serve.

If there are only two of you, that's okay. Just wrap each cooled leftover piece in clingy plastic wrap, and either freeze or refrigerate. Then you can have some later!

If you want a fancier quiche that will take much longer, this one really looks good: http://www.ouichefnetwork.com/oui_chef/2009/12/bouchons-quiche-lorraine.html
Someday I will make it and will let you know if the extra time and steps are worth it.

In the meantime, I'll just stick with the quick version.
Kathi